hungover sunday 24th Oct

The white sky seems to curve around the earth like a blanket, the scent in the air is of nothing much. And I walk.

grey skies

For some reason, on days like these I feel like I'm not myself. Like I don't recognise the girl who looks back at me in the mirror. Who is she? What do people think of her? Does anyone understand how she feels?

.

It's raining outside, and this is what I feel like, like I'm forever on the edge of a very tall building, wind pushing and pulling me, closer to the edge, then further away, until I'm so dizzy I either sit down or fall.

need him more

i need all of this

blue violets, outside my window

Or at least I think they're violets..?
Here's some inspiration.




Booked in my tattoo for a couple of days time. Excited!

decision maaaade

Do you swear to tell the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth? No
Where were you last night? At home, doing as little as possible
What is today's date? The 7th
Who was the last person to call you baby/babe? Hopefully no one, I hate that.
When you're at the grocery store do you use the self checkout? Yep, miss independent, thats me!
Anyone crushing on you? Apart from my cat, no.
What is your relationship status? Single, ready to mingle!
Has anyone ever sang to you? My ipod. Does that count?
Has anyone ever given you roses? Noope
If you were abandoned in the wilderness, would you survive? I think I'd try my hardest to, I suppose I have been known to watch Bear Grylls a fair bit.
Who do you text the most? My friends.?
How do you make your money? I sell my .. body. Actually I sell coffee.
First person to text today? A certain favourite of mine.
What is your favorite color? Red, red, RED!
What color are your eyes? Green, green, green!
What is a compliment you receive often? That I have nice eyes.
How tall are you? Not tall enough.
Who was the last person to say they loved you and when? My brother, only ten minutes ago.
Do you secretly like someone? Well if I do, it's a secret even from myself.
Why did your last relationship end? Because I didn't want it to.
Where is the furthest place you've traveled? 13 hours flying, from my home.
Which do you prefer, to eat or sleep? Sleep, by far!
How long does it take you to shower? Slightly more than is acceptable in the current climate.
Are you flexible? Quite. I think.
What did you do on New Years Eve? Friend's house, had a bit of a dramatic night. NYE is always terrible.
Can you speak any other language than English? Apart from 1-10 in a couple, and the word 'love' in several, no.
What is the last letter of your middle name? Y
How many hours of sleep did you get last night? Only 5 or so I think, I'm a terrible sleeper.
Do you wear your seatbelt in the car? Always.
Are you scared of flying? Not scared, nervous perhaps.
What do you sleep in? PJ pants and a t-shirt.
Who was the last person you kissed? A boy.
Do you like funny people or serious people? People who can be both serious and funny. If you're only one, I think that's limited.
What are you listening to? City and Colour, but it's on shuffle and Dashboard Confessional just came on.
What jewellery do you wear all the time? My thumb ring, and my sleeper that's in the top of my ear. I also usually wear a necklace and earrings.
What do you have planned for tonight? Nothing, going to bed early, early, early!
Is the last person you kissed older than you? Younger than me actually. Cougarrrrr.
Do you have a favorite item of clothing? Yes, my collection of blazers probably.
Last thing you ate? Green beans..
What was last thing you drank? Some stale water that was next to my bed.
Are you happy right now? Vaguely, I suppose I would be.
If you could have one thing right now what would it be? Can't actually think of anything. Perhaps a walk in wardrobe, or a clean room.
What were you doing at midnight last night? Sleeping.
Are you left handed? No, but I hear left-handed men are better in bed. I swear I wouldn't know personally..
What was for dinner tonight? Salaad!
What is the last thing you thought about? God I don't know, it's hard enough being myself, let alone trying to explain my thought processes!

nothing else to write about, so here's this - not very interesting, sorry

name: bellaaaa
age: older than i look
city: i'd like another
occupation: dreamer/coffee girl
what is your current state of mind? dry and bored
what is your greatest extravagance? ugh, shoes
what is your greatest fear? spiders or probably being forgotten
what is the trait you most deplore in others? boringness
what do you consider the most overrated virtue? money - it's a virtue, believe me. still overrated however.
if you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? the length of my hair. it's quite long but not long enough
what is the quality you most like in a man? not many
what is the quality you most like in a woman? maturity - the ability to put aside pettyness and bitchhing and grow up!
which words of phrases do you most overuse? seriously?
which talent would you most like to have? the ability to not have stage fright, and sing my heart out in front of people.
what or who is the greatest love of your life? hopefully still to come
where would you like to live? where wouldn't i like to live! siberia actually, that seems a bleak place. paris would be nice.
what is your favourite occupation? writing, dancing, singing, laughing
what is your most treasured possession? my friends and family
who are your favourite writers? so many!
who is your favourite hero of fiction? hard to say. harry potter. i still haven't given up the hope he's actually real though.
who are your heroes in real life? everyone who was the traits i admire - loyalty, honesty, ability to laugh and take the piss of themselves. serious people are boring.
what do you most value in your friends? loyalty
what is your most marked characteristic? strong headed
how would you like to die? i wouldn't, but if i was able to choose, probably a way that wouldn't hurt - too much - and surrounded by my loved ones
what is your motto? nothing matters, except life, and the love you make

early spring

I'm sitting outside in the warm Spring air - 18 degrees at the moment, not as warm as it's meant to be at this time of year, but still a pleasant change from the freezing cold mornings I'm used to.

The puppy is chewing a stick, and I just ordered an iPhone 4.
So all is well in the world, really.